Wise Words...

Warning:
This is a strong message, which some people may find upsetting to read, but I feel is necessary to write. 
Thank you.  Catherine.


My favourite quote from Mother Teresa:

People are often unreasonable and self-centred. Forgive them anyway.
If you are kind, people may accuse you of ulterior motives. Be kind anyway.
If you are honest, people may cheat you. Be honest anyway.
If you find happiness, people may be jealous. Be happy anyway.
The good you do today may be forgotten tomorrow. Do good anyway.
Give the world the best you have and it may never be enough. Give your best anyway.
For you see, in the end, it is between you and God. It was never between you and them anyway.”
― Mother Teresa


Note:

Due to a 'comment' made to me on Sunday, I would just like to clarify that the quilt I am making; 'Waves for Tommy', will be hand-measured & hand-cut with a rotary cutter.  The patch-work and the majority of quilting shall be done on my 'Singer' sewing machine.  The central diamond-shaped medallions - I wish to hand-quilt. I myself am sponsoring the fabric for this project, not to mention the time and the skill it will take to make it, and then there is also the effort which I am putting in, to publicise the project and the time that others are willing to spend chatting through some ideas with me about P.R. and how to go about auctioning the quilt. 

As the quilt is a large one and includes 1166 triangles, I would need far too much time in which to make it entirely by hand. In other words; if the fact that the quilt will not be entirely hand stitched, bothers you, you need not take part in sponsoring it. It is entirely up to you. If you spend time reading this blog, you will however learn, that this quilt is about something far greater than whether the quilt is hand stitched or machine sewn.  And I am certain that if people in years gone by had sewing machines, they would have used them.

This quilt is about spreading the word and showing my support for a young man who, let's face it, is placing himself in a very vulnerable situation, in the middle of the Atlantic Ocean, testing his physical and mental strength, to raise funds for a very important charity which helps people with mental health problems - the charity is called 'Mind'. Furthermore, the work of the charity itself is important in supporting people who would otherwise receive no help - and further still, is trying to change the way that our society in Britain views this subject, as it has been cruelly stigmatised!

Something which we should never forget is that the human brain is fragile.  With just the right amount of stress and pressure, or due to a car crash or other accident, permanent damage may be caused to the brain. Not to mention acts of mental cruelty and abuse.  No person on this earth is excluded from the possibility that we may very well find ourselves in a position where we may have to seek help from 'Mind'.

Now, I wish to share a little of my experience with you, as we are on the topic of 'Mental Health' and it is 'Lent' - a time for reflection.
 
My uncle (my mother's eldest brother) told my mother one day, that if anything ever happened to her, he would take me under his wing and look after me.  Sadly, years later, when I was about 14-16 years old, my uncle was involved in a terrible accident which involved a speeding lorry crashing into the back of my uncle's car on a busy high-way.  He was badly injured receiving trauma to the brain which went undetected for too long a period of time. When the trauma was eventually detected, he was treated at a mental health hospital.  We would visit him regularly, and eventually we moved him into my mother's home so that we could look after him. For me, the hardest thing to accept and understand was, how a strong, independent, healthy man, could just, overnight, become an extremely vulnerable, fearful, weeping child, in an adult body.  At first, he frightened me - even to tears, and it took time for me to get used to the change I saw in my uncle. 

In fact, I only truly understood the change I saw in my uncle, in 2010 - when I took a short course in Psychology with the Open University.  The part of his brain which had been damaged, was the cognitive part where remembering occurs. In other words; my uncle recognised our faces, but did not remember that we were his family.  Our familial connection had broken. Similar to that in dementia.

A long while later the doctors said he was able to return to his family - wife and three sons. He returned home to his family, but shortly after, sadly, as a result of severe pain from the brain injury, side-effects caused by prescribed medication and probably the final straw - him witnessing his youngest son being shot at the gate of their home, in a random drive-by shooting spree and dying in the arms of his eldest brother - my uncle (after three attempts) finally managed to take his own life - his eldest son, found his body.

What we as a family witnessed, and despite everything we tried to do for my uncle - the sense of helplessness we all felt, not to mention the grief of losing a loved one, twice, and of course the loss of our dear cousin/brother, is something I would never wish upon any other person.

So, the next time we may be tempted to say in jest: 'You're mad!' or 'You must be mental' or 'I think she/he is mentally ill'...  - we should spare a thought for 'Mind', and take back our words, as words are more powerful than we can ever imagine.  And I also wish to ask, that next time one speaks, perhaps one should think, before passing judgement or criticism on this quilt project, or anything or anyone else, for that matter.

As I sew I pray for Tommy's safety and for those who are affected by mental health trauma - as that is what it is - traumatic.  And as I sew I shall pray for a change of hearts and minds.  'Lord have mercy. Amen'

Thank you for choosing to support 'Waves for Tommy'.  By supporting this project you are supporting Tommy as he rows... and ultimately, you are supporting 'Mind'.

May God bless you. Kind regards.
Catherine